The Dreaded Hat

It began as a joke, but it has turned into something far more sinister. The Vol hat, as it is commonly called, was purchased in a nondescript gas station in rural West Tennessee in 2003.

During that fateful trip to see the Commodores play Mississippi State, the hat was merely an idea. It was already becoming a reality, though, for poor Coach GQ, who made the mistake of selecting the underachieving Auburn Tigers as his first selection in the pool draft weeks earlier. In 2004, Coach Woody suffered through a season with the hat after securing the hat in a photo finish finale (when Iowa State dumped Missouri in overtime). Last season, Coach Rob fell victim to the "Wannstedt effect," when Pittsburgh and Purdue mailed in the better part of their seasons, and wound up as this year's hat bearer.

With the Vol hat comes much, much shame and the potential for public ridicule. As declared in Rule #13, the hat "shall be worn to all sporting events and game nights where all participants are in attendance until the following football season has ended."