Go Bears!!

On September 1st this fall, my favorite team will be the California Bears for approximately 4 hours, give or take:

ABC Sports announced today that it will televise Tennessee's season-opening contest at California Sept. 1 in prime time to kick off the second season of ESPN on ABC's Saturday Night Football. The telecast will kick off at 7 p.m. and be offered in high definition on ABC HD. Since 1997, UT's season-opener has appeared on national television every year except 2005, when the Vols' game against UAB was broadcast regionally by Jefferson Pilot Sports. UT has won its last 12 season-openers.

Tennessee last appeared on ABC in 2003, when the 18th-ranked Volunteers defeated sixth-ranked Miami 10-6 Nov. 8. The Vols have only appeared on ABC 11 times since 1995, but Tennessee has been victorious in nine of those contests. The Big Orange fans have traditionally traveled well to the West Coast. Tennessee expects to sell all of its 7,500 ticket allotment. The Vols opened the 2006 season with a 35-18 win over California at Neyland Stadium.

Sorry to make you revisit your painful past, Coach Bando, but The Tennessean brought it up, not me. ;)

Child abuse

This is not for the faint of heart. I'm resisting the urge to vomit. It is sad to see the indoctrination and brainwashing begin so young.

Happy New Year, Phil!

Thanks, Penn State, for helping ring in 2007 in good fashion. The Nittany Lions dispatched the hated Vols 20-10 today. I think I can safely speak for the entire FP in saying that this is a wonderful way to open the new year. Here's hoping for more of the same (UT losses) this fall! Go Vol opponents!

Hawgs whip Vols

The FP's unofficial favorite team, Whoever Is Playing UT, whipped the Vols 31-14 Saturday night. It always brings joy to the FP to wake up and read this in The Tennessean:

What was shaping up as a special season for Tennessee's football team suddenly has hit the skids. The Vols put the wraps on a forgettable week in dubious fashion Saturday night, as Darren McFadden stepped up his Heisman Trophy campaign and 11th-ranked Arkansas just flat stepped all over the Vols in a 31-14 whipping that was much worse than the final score indicated.

"I don't have any excuses about why we lost," senior receiver Jayson Swain said. "We just got beat physically, and that's pretty much it."

The Orange Crush is giddy and demanding to be consumed, coaches. See you Saturday!

Updates

The standings have been updated to reflect the latest FP results. The FP Indices (bottom of the page) have also been adjusted to reflect this past weekend's activity:

• The Commodore Count is at Level 6 (Vols lose) in response to LSU's victory.
• The VOL Index is at Level 3 (Trailer Park Frenzy) as a result of the recent Vol arrests.
• The Wagon Watch has returned to relatively safe territory at Level 3 (Citrus Bowl bound).

Click "The FP Indices" on the sidebar if you need a refresher about any of these measuring tools.

It's still better than orange

Poor thing

The brainwashing begins early in Knoxville. This cute little fellow never had a chance.

Pick your poison

Pick your poison
Originally uploaded by rrob13.
Yuck. I'm so glad we're leaving East Tennessee. Head west, fast!

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Originally uploaded by rrob13.
Thank goodness the Vols officially cannot win the national title. This is why I hate them, in a nutshell. Ok, in a T-shirt, but you get the idea.

Rocky Top fallout

Let the chaos begin in Knoxville. Less than 12 hours after dropping a game to LSU, three Vols players get back to their favorite pastime.

Peyton and Phil (above) would not be pleased.

Jamal!

Jamal stopped by to make his mark, too. No word whether this photo was taken before or after his cocaine bust.

Woo hoo!

The bad news: 1998 happened. We have to accept that.

The good news: It officially won't happen in 2006. This morning, the Orange Crush is begging to be consumed. Woo hoo!

Bring it on

Vol country was fired up for yesterday's big matchup with Coach Bando's LSU Tigers.